1-3-12

life is at my face as of the moment, but why? why am i so afraid, why am i so confused with everything. my mind's a mess right now.

i'm here; stood still
wants to but refuses to take a step
sitting all day and night, thinking.
hoping that it will clear out.
am i hurt or something?

maybe  i'm deaf, maybe blind

something's wrong  but in my mind, only a little is worth.

it continues to spin.

i continue to be irrelevant.

am i just overthinking everything?

or maybe i am really a screwup.

this is shit

i hate it.

1-3-12

lost, looking back on where you've came from, you achieved nothing. big leaps seemed to be like baby steps. is it this hard? so hard to step forward. you want to choose stepping forward but to what direction. still afraid of those who eyed him. to fail. moving forward makes no assurance. you stood there rock hard, refusing to everything from outside. you are there, in solitude. now, refuses to take part of what's already in there and starting to show what are you really and what do you really want. 

i'm stuck here for a while now.